REFLECTIONS
Featured writer, Patty Zemanick
Roses
From God
When I was
growing up, turning sixteen meant I could get a job. It also meant
extra spending money and new clothes (real important stuff to a teenager).
So as soon as I became sixteen I went to work. I didn’t realize it
at the time, but that would be the first of many jobs and over the next
twenty years I would work without ceasing. Even after giving birth
to two children I was back to the grind just a few weeks later. It’s
not that I loved having a job outside of home – it was a financial necessity.
In fact, I longed to be a ‘stay-at-home mom.’ I wanted to see what
life would be like… to be able to carve out a time with God each morning,
to be there for my kids when they got home from school, to be able to tidy
up my home or start a meal before 6:30 p.m. Then one day, I got my
chance. My job ended and amazingly we were still financially okay.
About
that time I met a wonderful woman at church. Her name was Connie.
She and I became friends and we began spending a lot of time together.
Connie was a beautiful woman and radiated the love of Christ. We
joined a women’s Bible study together and our friendship grew. One
day Connie shared with me that she had cancer and the disease was progressing
rapidly. Her need for help was growing too. Because God had
blessed me with my new found ‘stay-at-home mom’ status, I was able to drive
Connie to her doctor’s appointments and chemo treatments. I was able
to run to the pharmacy for her or cook some meals. Connie was a ‘giver’
not a ‘taker,’ so being on the receiving end was difficult for her.
But each time she allowed me to do something for her I experienced great
joy, because I was serving the Lord through her.
Now don’t
get me wrong. I don’t want this to sound like a story about ‘me’
and ‘the good things I have done’ – cause nothing could be further from
the truth. I’m sharing this story with you because of ‘God’ and ‘the
incredible things He does.’ I am in awe of His wonderful ways as
He orchestrates events in our lives… so we’ll know Him better. I
am in awe of the way He brings people together, if only for a season, to
create something of lasting beauty. When he brought Connie and me
together, He knew our needs. He knew Connie would need a friend as
her illness worsened, that she would need some help when she was no longer
able to drive, He knew she would need someone who was only a phone call
away when she cried out in pain… someone to pray with her and comfort her.
And God knew I had needs of my own. He knew of my incredible
fear of death… He knew that as a child I would wake at nights screaming
out in fear at the thought of dying and being separated from my family.
Only God knew that even as an adult I still woke at night with those fears,
so terrified it felt as if my breath was being drawn out of me.
Connie
was nearing death. I drove to the hospital to be with her.
I stood beside her, held her hand and stroked her hair. Then someone
asked me to read the 23rd Psalm. I thought to myself, “That’s the
Psalm that’s always read before someone dies. Oh no… not me.
Lord, please let someone else read that. I’m afraid of death.
Let someone with stronger faith read those verses.” But the Bible
was passed to me and my thoughts never reached my lips. Nervously
I turned the pages and began to read aloud…
“The
Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down
in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul.”
I looked at Connie, she seemed at peace. I was feeling at peace too.
Thank you God. “He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear
no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.”
I thought, ‘Connie – we don’t have to be afraid. We’re not alone
when we go through this. God is WITH us as we walk through death.
And did you notice the ‘through’ word? That means there’s another
side. That means heaven Connie. We’ll be together again.’
“You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You
anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and love
will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of
the Lord forever.” Forever… my fear of death had melted away.
I said good-bye to my dear friend, kissed her on the cheek and whispered
in her ear “I’ll see you later… heaven’s going to be awesome” (meaning
it with all my heart).
A few
days following Connie’s death my financial situation shifted and it was
once again necessary for me to return to work. God had set aside
just enough time for my precious friend and me. Monday morning came
and I was dressing for a job interview when my doorbell rang. I opened
the door and there wasn’t anyone there, but at my doorway there was a simple
glass vase filled with incredible roses. Not roses from a flower
shop, but roses from someone’s garden. I found out later that my
friend had placed them there. She said to me, “Roses never grow well
in my garden, but this year they were magnificent. I was pulling
out of my garage to drive to work and a thought occurred to me… ‘I need
to take some roses to Patty.’ But I was running late for an appointment
and continued on to work. The burden became so heavy I knew it was
something that had to be done NOW. So despite the fact that I’d be
late for work I turned the car around, went back home and gathered some
roses for you. I figured that God must really want you to have them.”
Roses
from God… yep – that’s how it felt… as though they had come from His hands
directly. Too bad He didn’t include one of those little cards, cause
I’d love to see His handwriting. Yet, if he had I think it probably
would have read something like this…
Dear
Patty,
Just
wanted to let you know that Connie arrived.
We
are having a wonderful celebration.
Much
love,
God
P.S.
I’m glad you finally got over that “fear of death” thing.
Remember
– I am with you always!
Patty
