Joy
in Friendship
Hello
friends, it’s been awhile. Or maybe this is the first time you’ve
been to the Joy To You page. I’m glad you are here.
Ouch.
I hurt; I cried. My tummy ached from the pain of rejection; someone
I loved had left me. We used to laugh together and share our most
private thoughts. There was no one else I could trust like I had
trusted this person. I had slowly and carefully come to love and care about
this person. I had tried to take care of this persons needs before
I took care of my own.
I miss
this person’s friendship so much. I miss our laughing together. I miss
our talking about ourselves at the same time and not really listening to
each other. We were just glad to have someone to talk to. I miss
this person’s smile. I miss this person’s encouraging words. I miss
this person telling me, “look at yourself before you point a finger.”
I’m so sad; I’m so hurt. We shared some tough times together,
which caused me to bond with this person. We were there for each other
when we were down. I miss this person in my life.
Does
this sound like something you have experienced? You know, this could be
a husband, a relative, a friend. Whoever it was, it hurt so deeply
that you swore to never trust anyone again like you did this person.
You promised yourself you would never love like this again. No, never
again. No one would ever have that part of you that is vulnerable.
That was it. The end.
Where
is the joy when you are hurt so deeply that your body aches and the sobs
are so loud they scare your dog? (Don’t laugh—they really did!) How
would I get past feeling so betrayed and rejected? Where do
I go for joy in the midst of this? Where do I go when I feel so alone?
Go to
prayer; meet Jesus there. What I had tried to gain from earthly relationships
could only come from a personal relationship with God, allowing the Holy
Spirit to minister to my needs. I do believe that God has placed
in us the desire to have earthly friendships. Jesus had close friends,
John (one of the disciples), Lazarus and his sisters Martha and Mary.
However, Jesus sought the will of God before seeking earthly relationships.
“…But
seek first His Kingdom and His Righteousness, and all these things shall
be given to you as well.” Matthew 6:33
Without
the Holy Spirit dwelling within us we cannot love, forgive, share, trust,
etc. In and of ourselves we are nothing—dead nothings.
Paul
put it this way in Romans:
“Anyone
who lives according to the sinful nature (flesh controlled) has their minds
set on what that nature(flesh) desires; but anyone who lives in accordance
(oneness) with the Holy Spirit has their mind set on what the Spirit of
God desires! The mind of sinful man is death. The mind controlled
by the Spirit of God is life and peace. (Hey---that’s JOY
to me!)
The
sinful mind is hostile to God. The sinful mind does not submit to God’s
law. (One of which is John 13:34) The sinful mind
cannot do so.
Anyone
controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God. You, however,
are controlled not by the sinful nature but by the Spirit of God, if the
Spirit of God lives in you (yeah-YOU and in Me!)
And
if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong in Christ,
but if Christ is in you, your body is dead because of sin because your
spirit is alive because of righteousness. (Hey, but we’re walking around,
so how are we alive???) If the Spirit of God who raised Jesus from the
dead is living in you, God who raised Christ from the dead will also “GIVE”
life to your mortal body through His Spirit, who lives in you!
So,
sisters and brothers, we have an obligation---but it is not to the sinful
nature (flesh) to live according to its demands. For if you live
according to the sinful nature, you will die. If by the Spirit you
put to death the sins of the body, you will live!!!!
Those
who are led by the Spirit of God are sons and daughters of God.
For
you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear… but
you received the Spirit of Sonship (and Daughtership).
And
by Him we cry… “Abba. Father.”
The
Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children.
Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with
Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings, in order that we may also
share in His glory!” Romans 8:5-17
Bottom
line… In order to have “Joy” in an earthly relationship, it will
have to be with another believer; one who allows the Holy Spirit to dwell
within them and who recognizes their inheritance. This does not mean that
you are not to be kind and loving to all mankind. God has commanded that
of us. It is with His love that we do so. I’m referring to a close
intimate friendship, the type that never dies.
God has
given us the gift of friendship:
v
Someone to communicate with on earth.
v
Someone that loves you in spite of yourself.
v
Someone that corrects you when you need it.
v
Someone that lifts you up when you are down.
v
Someone whose needs you meet before your own.
v
Someone that you forgive over and over.
I love
you and will write more soon,
Martha
If you
want to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, go to our home
page and click on the NeedHim icon. Call the number on the screen
and talk to someone who has been where you are and who and wants you to
know Christ. NeedHim counselors will pray with you and help you understand
what it means to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.
You are in our prayers. We love you.
